Introduction

Stress is a dis-ease—the deprivation of ease; the reduction of comfort. The word stress is derived from distress. Someone is in distress when they experience hardships, straits, adversity, or affliction. Stress is an emotional experience externally triggered. Some people are stressed by a work deadline, or a conflict, or an embarrassing moment, or a long to-do list. It might be said that a chemist stresses chemicals with fire. Or a storm stresses a ship with wind and waves. The fire causes the chemicals to react differently than they naturally do. The wind causes the ship to sail otherwise than it typically would. Likewise, stress compels or extorts a person into unordinary behaviors or emotions.

Stress produces mental symptoms, such as irritability, worry, or anger. It also produces physical symptoms, such as elevated blood pressure, nervous feeling in the bowels, or insomnia. Anxiety, in slight distinction, is a weighted worry that won’t withdraw even if the external stressor is removed. Anxiety is nonspecific. Stress is specific. Some people internalize their stress in an act of nemesism. Other people externalize their stress.

The heightened tempo of modern life combined with work instability, financial insecurity, and family vulnerability, threatens to destroy what people have, know, and are. Stress enters. But stress is nothing new. Stress can be caused when the enemy attacks (2 Kgs. 19:3) or when the king demands high taxes (Neh. 9:37). Stress results when people don’t have the law or a priest (2 Chron. 15:3). Fear leads to stress (Prov. 1:27). So does travel and hunger (Is. 8:21). Misfortune causes stress (Obad 12) as does impending death (Ps. 116:3; Mk. 14:33). The soul can feel stress (Gen. 42:21), which is why stress can lead to newfound openness to religion (Jdg. 10:14). Sometimes God sends stress to his enemies (2 Chron. 15:6; Ps. 78:49). God hears and saves those who cry in distress (1 Sam. 10:19; Job 27:9; Ps. 81:7; 120:1). Joy, love, and faith are powerful remedies to stress (Ps. 31:7; 1 Thess. 3:7).

Three truths about stress

First, stress should lead to righteousness rather than sin

Some amount of stress is inevitable. The pressures of life and the corresponding stress, whether great or small, are used by God to purify his people. Peter writes, “For a little while, if necessary, you have been grieved by various trials, so that the tested genuineness of your faith — more precious than gold that perishes though it is tested by fire — may be found to result in praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ” (1 Pt. 1:6-7). God can take the stress of life to refine rather than consume. The author of Hebrews says, “[God] disciplines us for our good, that we may share his holiness. For the moment all discipline seems painful rather than pleasant, but later it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it” (Heb. 12:10-11).

But sanctification isn’t the inevitable outcome of stress. Stress drives some people away from Christ, “As for what was sown on rocky ground, this is the one who hears the word and immediately receives it with joy, yet he has no root in himself, but endures for a while, and when tribulation or persecution arises on account of the word, immediately he falls away” (Mt. 13:20-21).

Second, stress reveals latent sin

One reason God allows stress is to unveil unacknowledged sin. Job, a blameless and upright man (Job 1:1) had pride and anger that was revealed through suffering (Job 13:24). What did Job do once his sin was revealed? He repented in dust and ashes (Job 42:5-6). The stress of Christ’s crucifixion revealed the fallow commitment of Peter. This event was used to fortify Peter’s allegiance to the Lord (Mk. 14:66-72; Jn. 21:15-19). When the stress of life hits, the goal is to do all that faithfulness requires and see the fruit of righteousness ripen. The Psalmist says, “Be angry and do not sin” (Ps. 4:4). Likewise, be stressed and do not sin. Do not be stressed about anything but in everything by prayer let your requests be made known to God (Phil. 4:6-7).

Third, stress may be the root cause of your porn problem

Poor stress management may be the underlying problem of repeated sin. Just like someone may eat comfort food after a hard day, so too they can engage in sin as a comfort sin. When stress is thick, porn may seem like a mild dalliance. The response to loneliness, bitterness, or stress may be to doom scroll toward pornography. Unconfessed sins feed impurity. The result is people treat porn as therapy. Except it’s the therapy of regret (Rom. 7:15). Porn isn’t medication. It’s poison, no matter how large the dose. Porn isn’t an anti-depressant. It’s a rue-bargain.

Porn as Stress Therapy

Let’s examine the habit of someone using porn as stress therapy. When stress begins, the temptation to porn increases. What should he do? He should cling with confidence to the wisdom of the divine prohibition, “Flee from sexual immorality” (1 Co. 6:18). But instead of instantly repelling the porn insinuation, he gives the temptation a place in his mind. Stress sets in and the truth is impugned. The perverting influence of stress begins. He yields to the anti-God and the principle of sin and death. He falls under the power of false confidence in a beguiling promise—that he deserves the diversion.

1 John 2:16, “For all that is in the world—the desires of the flesh and the desires of the eyes and pride of life—is not from the Father but is from the world.”

The motive of the stress-induced porn habit is three-fold. First, porn is a path to fleshly pleasure. He anticipates replacing the stress of the moment with the pleasure of sensation. The lust of the flesh is awakened. Second, porn is a delight to the eyes. His will is influenced by a false estimate that divorces the body from the spirit. The lust of the eyes leads him captive to the prowling dragon (1 Pt. 5:8). Third, porn is the pride of life. False attitudes toward God imply false attitudes toward himself.[1] Accepting the word of the tempter, he sees in the porn the promise of escape. Pleasure and forgetfulness appear all at once. Judgment is darkened. The truth of God is doubted. The stressed man ascends a scale of wisdom of the devil’s making as if it were folly to do right by standing firm in fidelity.

When the habits of lust are the daily jog-trot of the stressed-out man, he becomes the bearer of a false moral principle. When fully grown, this principle manifests in patterns of sin resembling the old nature (Gal. 5:16-21). Treating porn as stress therapy is the outcome of spiritual decadence which begins with the cunning self-assertion that porn is the diversion you deserve. Augustine said, “When the will abandons what is above itself and turns to what is lower, it becomes evil….wickedly desiring an inferior thing.”[2]

James reminds us that death is the progeny of lustful desires giving birth to sin. James 1:14-15, “Each person is tempted when he is lured and enticed by his own desire. 15 Then desire when it has conceived gives birth to sin, and sin when it is fully grown brings forth death.”

New Habits

Proverbs 8:35-36, “For whoever finds me [wisdom] finds life and obtains favor from the Lord, 36 but he who fails to find me [wisdom] injures himself; all who hate me love death.”

There is in habit almost an idea of captivity. The fool makes a habit of using porn as stress therapy (Prov. 2:16-19; 5:3-14; 5:20; 6:24-26, 32-34; 7:5-27; 9:13-18; 22:14; 25:27f; 29:3). The wise man makes new habits befitting the new creation (Eph. 4:17-32). If your stress-coping habit is porn, anger, or sullenness, then you need new habits. Habits aren't an option. Humans are designed for habits. No one gets over a bad habit. They only replace it with a better (or worse) habit. Habits can't be starved out, though ironically, fasting may be the new habit that best replaces a sinful one. The habit of fasting crowds out the debauched habit.

Why fasting? It's because of your union with Christ. By faith, you are united to Christ in all that he has accomplished in his death and resurrection. Suffering, death, and resurrection were how Christ learned obedience (Heb. 2:9; 5:8). Do you think you will learn obedience in a way different from the Lord (Lk. 6:40)? Christ-followers learn obedience through suffering. In other words, the voluntary suffering of discipline (i.e. of true discipleship, of saying "no" to soul-killing habits) is following the Christ path and living out your union with Christ. The faithful person suffers with and for Christ when he beats the sensual desires of the body into submission. Embracing the suffering that Christ embraced (which is virtuous asceticism) is the only way to overcome the dissatisfaction, stress, and restlessness that stirs lustful passions. Allowing stress and restlessness to lead to lustful gratification is soul negligence. You can’t replace the carnal desire unless you frustrate it. And you can’t frustrate sadness, stress, worry, or gratification without discipline (1 Cor. 9:27; Titus 1:8; Heb. 12:5-11) and self-control (Acts 24:25; 1 Cor. 9:25; Gal. 5:23; 1 Tim. 2:15; 1 Tim. 3:2; 2 Tim. 1:7; Titus 2:6).

Habit-making is always a religious activity, even if the new habit is to drink beer in the shower. So, discipline is proceeding a way of life. Jesus loves the distressed more than you can comprehend (Rom. 8:35). If you labor and are heavy laden; if you need spiritual rest, then go to Jesus Christ (Mt. 11:25-30). If you are susceptible to impurity, then kill the porn habit and go to Christ who gives peace (Jn. 14:27). If you are unhappy, then go to the Source of Joy (Ps. 16:11) that your joy may be full (Jn. 15:11). If you need love, then go to the Father, who is love (1 Jn. 4:8).

Conclusion

The greatest stress in the history of the world was experienced by an innocent man in a lonely garden (Mark 14:32-52). In the Garden of Gethsemane, Jesus feels stress because he knows that the crucifixion will cut him off from the realm of God and he wants to be spared from this. Jesus does not want to face the cross, but if it is God’s will, he volunteers to face it. In this way, he will conquer the enemy, which is sin, death, and the devil (Col. 2:13-15; 1 Jn. 3:8).

The episode in Gethsemane reminds us that Calvary put Jesus through unequaled stress (Lk. 12:50; 22:44). In the garden, Jesus seeks the comfort of his three dearest disciples. Yet they sleep while Jesus prepares to face the wrath of God alone. Jesus prays. God the Father hears his prayers because of his reverence (Heb. 5:7). Jesus’ will conforms to the Father’s will and he “learned obedience” and went to the cross and endured suffering to become the source of eternal salvation for all who obey him (Heb. 5:8-9).  

Do you want to learn obedience even during whopping stress? Pray. In the garden, the disciples failed to pray. They claimed they were willing to share Jesus’ suffering. Yet they failed to live up to their words. Why? Because they didn’t pray. They slept. Jesus prayed and he avoided the temptation to sin amid the most stressful moment in the history of the world. What was his temptation?The temptation is to not go to the cross. But the entire ministry of Jesus is bringing him to the point of overcoming the fear of suffering on the cross. Throughout Jesus' ministry, he sets his journey in the direction of Jerusalem, in the direction of his gruesome death. Jesus knows what the Scriptures prophesied; He knows the Father’s will. He sets His face to do that will and He is willing to go.

Throughout the events in the Garden of Gethsemane, Jesus is distressed and troubled. God’s power is displayed in the weakness of his Son. Second Corinthians 13:4, “He was crucified in weakness, but lives by the power of God. For we also are weak in him, but … live with him by the power of God.” You too, when you pray to the Lord and submit to his will, become a vessel of weakness used for the mighty purpose of God. These are the new habits of the Christian life.

Jesus’ response to stress clarifies the possibility of obedience. In contrast to porn habits, good habits are always acts of restoration. They give the stressed person back to personhood. Just like a miracle gives the lame man new legs, so does the Spirit give new respectable habits to the penitent. Bad habits disguise the true form of the world. Good habits give blind eyes the sight to see the true form. Bad habits cast a dehumanizing spell. But the good habits of the One True Man turn death to life through the salvific blast and miracle that makes all things new.

[1] John Calvin, The Institutes of the Christian Religion, 1.1.1.

[2] Augustine, The City of God, 12.6.